To want and not to get

Eroticism, denial, trials, and lust.

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately about what exactly is the erotic, and if there is a commonality to all the varieties of kinks and fetishes and desires that I’ve seen and shared in.

I think it may come down to this: eroticism is passion plus an obstacle.

Whether it’s kink play like orgasm denial, wanting to role play sleeping with your secretary; whether it’s giving up complete control and getting tied up, or simply sleeping with an escort 1/3 your age, there is a want, a desire, and then a resistance that makes getting what you want more difficult.

And doesn’t that make you want it all the more?

We want what we cannot get, what we cannot have, and once we have it, so much of what made it delicious simply…

disappears.